| As this pandemic began to mess with my life, I first took a rather selfish stance.
My concerns went to my immediate family. How will COVID-19 affect us? What will we do with our son if he doesn’t have school for the rest of the year? Will I get a refund? Do we have enough food and water? Of course, do we have enough toilet paper? What about our trip to Spain? We were so excited. Much worse, what will happen to us financially? We just lost a lot of money in the market. Will it ever come back? Oh, and will the fear of the pandemic hamper the release of my book in August? It feels tone-deaf to hype a new novel when people the world over are fighting for their lives. For a moment there, I felt this very strong survival instinct take over, not unlike my reaction during the last scary hurricane. And I could have easily empathized with someone who might fight over the gas pump or food or toilet paper if the crisis worsened. And then I snapped out of it. With one tiny question, my entire perspective changed. With one question, I realized that COVID-19 is giving me a chance to be the best version of myself. What about the people that are worse off than me? Think about that question for a moment, like really ponder it. What about the people that are worse off than me? See that, what just happened? Like the flip of a switch, my entire mindset changed. What about the people with HIV in Wuhan who can’t get medicine? What about the woman in a nursing home who feels all alone right now? She doesn’t have much time left and she might not ever be able to see her daughter again, as her daughter can’t visit for fear of spreading the virus. What about the couple who had planned their retirement for this year, working their entire lives for the moment when they’d be able to hit the road in an RV to see their country? And then they watched in horror as their savings—just like the chance of living their dream—dwindled in a matter of days. What about the single parents who somehow have to navigate working a full-time job (or two), while taking care of their children who won’t be going to school for maybe the rest of the year? How in the world can they do what my wife is doing at this moment, which is figuring out how to home-school? What about the hourly wage workers living paycheck to paycheck? How will they pay their rent? Or even eat! What about the couple in Seattle who put all their money and time into the restaurant of their dreams, opening it just in time for spring? Their first few days are a success and they hug and kiss each other, knowing they’d finally done it. They’d made it. And then, suddenly, their restaurant is empty. For that matter, what about all the people who took giant risks and started their own companies in the past few months? And what about the people who actually have the virus and are dying? Or those who are losing their loved ones? The lesson I’ve learned and will white-knuckle all the way to the end of this crisis is that it isn’t about me protecting my family. It’s about my family looking out for strangers. It’s about me finding the strength to offer my last roll of toilet paper to my neighbor. It’s about me wondering if that elderly man down the street needs any help. It’s about me getting my selfish head out of my ass and doing the stuff that matters, being the man my parents raised me to be. Now is the time for me to love harder than I’ve ever imagined possible. My heart breaks for all of you who are struggling right now. If my family can do anything for you—if we can help in any way, all you have to do is ask. When I read stories about the brave souls in Wuhan finding ways to help people get medicine, or about the heroes racing to create a vaccine, or about anyone going out of their way to pull up their fellow man or woman, I am filled with tremendous hope. Not only will we overcome this awful plague, but mankind will come out better because of it. |
14 Responses
You wrote this over a year ago but I needed to hear it now. This week covid-19 cases are on a huge upswing in my small county in western NC and my community is now in the red zone . . . again. It breaks my soul to hear lifelong friends berating one another on social media over covid issues, health care coworkers at odds over their personal decisions to either get the vaccine or not to, moms ready to fight because their child has to wear a mask, moms ready to fight because masks are optional, and community leaders not really getting involved one way or the other. Being in the Bible Belt you would think love thy neighbor would be a bit easier to achieve in my front porch sitting hometown. Sadly the divisions are deep, everyone is right, and the tension is palpable.
Your post embodies the spirit of my town pre-covid. People taking care of one another, checking on neighbors, and being kind. I miss that. I would like to share some of your post with my community. They need something to get on board with that has nothing to do with a shot or mask, has no red or blue hue, and has nothing to do with socialism or capitalism! If only we could spend our energy building one another up instead of tearing each other apart. It’s high time that people in my town to get their selfish heads out of their asses.
Thanks so much for your thoughts! We live in an area where we’re not as affected by Covid like other cities but my heart breaks for those people (especially young families) who are trying to make it both emotionally and financially) Thanks for a wider perspective. Love the restaurant post too!!
Thanks for reading!
I too have been practicing gratefulness during this awful pandemic …..but damn ,it’s hard some days .Because I too wish there was more I could do personally for those who are suffering so much . The frustration is with it all is incredible !
What if the media moguls and political powerful have used the pandemic to create panic for their own reasons and advantage?
This pandemic is real and it is a terrible disaster. But, this is not first pandemic that has been terrible. But it is the first that has been so publicized that everyone panicked and the world’s economy’s were shut down.
And who got hurt the worst….. the mist vulnerable and lowest income people.
I never would have thoughts that we all could be lies to by our own government and by powerful media to the point that our lives were out of control and people were dying needlessly.
But with many calling for our institutions to be destroyed and our government replaced…… I think we are in the midst of a coup. Things are going to change forever unless we get strong patriotic leaders to stand up and stop the madness. The US has made mistakes, but we are a good and kind and extremely generous country and past generations have proven that many times.
This will not end well if the craziness isn’t stopped. I hope it can be stopped reasonably.
Hi Boo,
I lost my job on 9/11/20- my own 9/11 celebration- after being with that work family for six years, and finally realized some tough things about myself (I won’t spill my whole life here!) as I’ve been searching for another job. I’ve also used this time to read. A lot. I discovered your work and have blown through Red Mountain’s tales, and your Unfinished Story, and I have come away from those experiences completely moved, energized, impressed with the connection and empathy you demonstrate through your characters, and I am utterly inspired. That you are thinking so much about others and their struggles right now doesn’t surprise me in the slightest! But I am pleased to read about it here. The Austinite in me- aka my deep love and need for all things music- is saddened to learn that you had to give up a professional gig, and I can relate to how difficult that is, every day. However, the avid reader in me is freakin’ thrilled that you found this other voice within yourself and were able to share it with me (rest of the world be damned! I’m the one who matters here! Hee hee). These books have sparked more ideas about characters, story lines, and other creative writing pieces for me than anything else I’ve encounteed in my nearly five decades on this Earth, aside from maybe my senior high school English teacher! So, thank you. Seriously. Thank you for being the person you are behind these books. Thank you for your compassion and positive energy in a time where that’s becoming so difficult to find. Thank you for turning your pain into happiness, thank you for your creativity, thank you for sharing your stories- via both personal blog and creative narratives- with the world, and most of all thank you for (unintentionally) inspiring me to really look at my life and my talents again. Maybe one day I’ll have a book ‘on the shelves’ near yours, and maybe my personal story will work to pay forward what you’ve given me.
Meg,you are incredibly kind. And I must say, a wonderful writer. Get that book going now! I’d be honored to share the shelf space with you.
True to a word. Thank you.
Thank you! And hi, Inglath!
Beautiful. I am going to share this with family and friends. Hope that’s okay.
Absolutely!
It’s easy to get caught up in seeing things from our own selfish perspective. Thanks for the wakeup call.
This is great! Thank you
Thank you for reading!